Lamenting the passing of Mr. Common Sense

This was in the newspaper today, and I thought it was pretty good.


"I recently had an old friend pass away: Mr. Common Sense.
Mr. Sense had been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records had been lost a long time ago in a bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered for teaching such valuable lessons as "kindness is self-rewarding", "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" and "life isn't fair." His health began to deteriorate when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place; like a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a 6-year-old girl; a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, causing the student mental stress; or get parental consent to administer a aspirin to a student, but do not inform the parents when the student is pregnant or wants an abortion.
He lost his will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
He was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Descretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by two stepbrothers, My Rights and Ima Whiner.
Many people don't realize that he is gone.

Wm. J. Kuntz"